MAGISTRAL
Winds throw about clouds in the sky
And even faster vanish days and years.
Invaluable vision as far as sees the eye –
The harmony of Nature and precision…
‘My love shall in my verse ever live young…’
My heart and mind rejoice in this refrain,
My soul will fly, just when there comes the time,
To the Eternity from where comes my strain.
Shall I be able to catch in the starlit height
When humble soul comes up in the Lord’s presence
How on the Earth there’ll pray for me in light
Some living heart in tenderness and essence…
Who won’t judge, but just forgive the sins
And whisper verse of mine under nights’ screens…
• This is life (French)
I
Winds throw about clouds in the sky
Making them follow transparent streamline
Guarding the vault of Heaven diligently they try
To keep way up for moonlight and sunshine…
They don’t know time or sleep or age or death…
Nor have they cared for closed borderlines;
There’s nothing new under the sun, nevertheless
We do encounter new music and new rhymes.
One season after another comes in a long train
We’re waiting for the warmth and birds to sing,
We hopefully say farewell to spring
And heartily breathe out: summer is here!
Life’s in full swing – that’s all we need in spheres
And even faster vanish days and years.
II
And even faster vanish days and years.
One favourable choice there could be seen though:
Submit your destiny without favour or fears
As Nature treats the weather - fine or foul…
Today the future can’t be seen through mist
Mysterious, unclear or fascinating…
Some do believe in gambling that deceives
Then moan when the fraud comes ruthless and frustrating.
Some are really lucky who possess the mind’s eye
To knock the nonsense out of one’s head
However, I can’t see the better life thread
Than sentimental love can give to thrive…
There’s a tinge of sadness in clouds’ crimson fly… -
Invaluable vision as far as sees the eye.
III
Invaluable vision as far as sees the eye…
God’s project is as clear as a noonday.
Let cynics smile wryly – never mind!
Why should I care for mockers jealous and obscure?
Invitingly flickering among black-and-white days
Ash berries’ autumn bunch in verdure of the trees
As an icon lamp is brightening my ways
Through winters’ darkness, snowfalls, snow-slips…
The warmth of love’s been our salvation
From all misfortunes in the life we faced.
Until the tenderness of love feeds my sensation
Verse won’t fall into silence or out-of-date.
That wasn’t mine – that was our God’s decision –
The harmony of Nature and precision…
IV
The harmony of Nature and precision…
A scarlet flower in the wind’s eye…
As the last spark of life and glimmer of hope was its vision
When you came up, took captive of my life…
A scarlet flower* is a symbol of delight!
Neither an orchid’s regal look nor roses’ sweet-smelling,
Nor solemn strictness of marigolds could hide
The flower of love that illuminates our dwelling…
We come into the world to live, to fly,
To learn the bounty of God-created Nature
With open mind… or at least to make a try
And often face the failure of adventure…
However, to describe all that one needs good lungs.
‘My love shall in my verse ever live young…’
* Reference to a Russian fairy tale “A Scarlet Flower”
V
‘My love shall in my verse ever live young…’
The soul will live in the terms of poetic vision,
It’ll echo the latest spindle cry –
The promise to-come-back-in-spring decision…
They will return, with them the Easter will come
And over the whole land the bells will ring aloud,
And all the icons in the temples will shine
And the Holy Flame descent – there’s no doubt!
I live until my love lives in my heart,
I love until the Lord forgets me not,
I love until I live and in the life survive
Until I praise my life and a humble lot.
We’re still alive until we bear life’s strain -
My heart and mind rejoice in this refrain.
VI
My heart and mind rejoice in this refrain
Grown up at the Black sea in the Crimean Sun
And saturated with the aura of sunsets’ flame…
What I’ve become - to me my Love has done…
Where we met there’s no more our home.
But we return there every now and then
To breathe the fragrance, swim and play the foam
And in emotion we touch the aged bell…
It tolls for you and me in silent nights,
I feel to hear its husky voice again…
And wonder how it can reach our hearts
And make us strive with fears and regain.
‘My love shall in my verse…’ – my heart repeats the rhyme…
My soul will fly, just when there comes the time.
VII
My soul will fly, just when there comes the time.
We have to be obedient, trustworthy…
My dear Lord, please don’t stop the rhyme:
It makes the feelings of mine light and rosy…
… You came into this world at early dawn –
For me it was the dawn of brighter days
As I didn’t know yet for how long
We’d be surviving miserable ways.
We couldn’t but survive,
God was on our side:
He gave me you, my angel and my life,
Therefore I knew that we would reach the light…
This light will ever be the virtue not the vain
To the Eternity from where comes my strain.
VIII
To the Eternity from where comes my strain
Even if words of love I whisper low…
My heart is grateful time and time again
But still I pray the time: “Please, be not fast but slow!”
… The golden leaves rustle under the tired foot
Or autumn drizzles over the lonely nights
Whoever prays for me at night for good?
Whoever‘s mourning for my humble rights?
And I of course melt into the hearty prayer
And I of course look forward to salvation
And I of course remember all the flare
Of the Crimean twilights’ mystic in sensation…
The prayers of some sensitive tender heart
Shall I be able to catch in the starlit height?
IX
Shall I be able to catch in the starlit height
The prayers of those whom I loved and helped in my envision
Whenever I could spring my wings and help them find decision
For them to overcome for me - enlighten…
Shall I be able to hear streaming rains?
Shall I be able to hear spring birds’ singing?
Shall I be able to hear storms threatening living?
Shall it forever liberate my brains?
The Galaxy instead will tear by;
As a detached star I’ll dive in seas from skies
They say a fallen star means hopeful delights
To guess the future at it’s dying out light…
In the Next Time I’ll seize a new style essence
When humble soul comes up in the Lord’s presence
X
When humble soul comes up in the Lord’s presence
It will remember temples’ vesper-bell…
My soul is thankful to the Lord beyond all measures
For every path and place I have to dwell…
I do believe there’s no real death,
That we’ll just move to another Life beyond;
Still our life here is a priceless wealth
And we don’t hasten to the way of no return…
New spring comes warm and we light up with joy
Best feelings stream from the very bottom of hearts
And all the Lord’s time that we should employ
Here, on the Earth, He gives to improve us.
Often the question comes to me at night
How on the Earth they’ll pray for me in light…
XI
How on the Earth they’ll pray for me in light…
The Lent – the time of sorrow and grief
Each year longer becomes the mournful list
Of those who still come to dreams of night…
You can’t control the process, just send the Lord
For them who passed away – a prayer after prayer
And wonder if they could help their lot
There’s so little we know and therefore care…
When nights become dark, scary and freezing,
Full of God knows where from appearing fear…
I wish you would remember any season
About my desire to be near –
That’s why to you appeals with these caressing verses
Some living heart in tenderness and essence…
XII
Some living heart in tenderness and essence…
My soul is ever opened to you.
To triumph and to mourn I live - that’s true -
To be restored to life when loved, and die - when hurt.
Time’s made my cloak exorbitantly thin
And castles in the air melt as delusive hope,
But I’m relieved to know: ‘Love is my sin…’*
Tell what is to be done with memory to cope?
Forgive me, I can’t find the words that suit,
My heart just grieves - there cries invisible lute…
The time will come to leave, just shut the door behind,
The one who here stays will pray to clear up one’s mind,
The prayer will support the one who quit the scenes
Who won’t judge, but just forgive the sins.
* Love is my sin… W. Shakespeare, Son. CXLII
XIII
Who won’t judge, but just forgive the sins
Will you remember secrets of golden autumn?
The glimmering sun, the quietness lonely and solemn,
The glamorous beauty of autumn that stuns and wins…
Longing to walk into the deepness of marvellous autumn,
Gold of its woods, charms of the luring witch...
One can’t but feel the pain of homesickness
Heart beating lonely is no good to teach...
All tenderness stayed with you in the letters
Warmth of my heart in the poetry also stayed…
I’m bewildered, dissolving in autumn... - and that is
How by flame of the golden autumn I’m saved.
Gold autumn, bless my day by any means*
And whisper verse of mine under nights’ screens…
* September, 8 – St. Natalia day in Orthodox Christian Church
XIV
And whisper verse of mine under nights’ screens…
The candle will be lit to shine through the night
The verse in its transparency and clearance
Will come to you to say that everything’s all right;
Because the Lord is with us in the grief,
His consolation and help we ask in prayer,
He helps us know that we don’t die, but live
Let’s look at Nature – everything is there:
The harmony in changing the times
To die in winter and to bloom in summer
The same happens in the nature of us.
So, C’EST LA VIE! – Remember: anyhow
The Universe works under the Lord’s eye…
Winds throw about clouds in the sky…
Line drawing by Maria Shamberova.
